I have identified as an athlete almost as long as I can remember. My athletic career evolved from giving a go at the whole dance thing to a successful collegiate runner, and eventual cyclist. I have often had things to train for; to put my energy into, but with that being halted due to Covid-19, I’ve found myself taking a step back, reflecting.

 I’ve been thinking a lot about the athletes who had their final seasons taken away from them due to the pandemic. While necessary, there is still a loss of the competitions that will never be. I think about seniors in high school and college who had one more season to look forward to, perhaps putting in a year’s worth of effort all for those final few months of their athletic career. Gone, so quickly. There is grief in this and important to honor that loss. 

For many, perhaps sports may feel unimportant, however, for an athlete, this is far from the truth. As an athlete myself, I know how deeply rooted identity can be in the chosen athletic pastime. There is so much work that goes into sports that no one sees. Time spent away from friends because of training, early bed times and early mornings, carefully managing time so that every item on the “to do” list can get done. 

Athletes, I see you, and know this time of uncertainty and loss can weigh heavily. It is okay to grieve the loss of a season, a race, a competition that you were so looking forward to. It’s okay feel some anger towards the situation. It’s okay to feel whatever it is you are feeling and ask yourself, what am I training for?

 What a simple question, yet it feels so loaded. What am I training for? It’s easy when there is a season coming up, a race on the schedule, a competition date months out. We have a goal in mind, we train for that goal, and hope to execute that goal on the day. I have had races cancelled this year due to the pandemic. I support this decision fully, and have decided to use this time to reflect on my athletic abilities and my connection to the sport. 

What I have found with reflection on athletics is that there are so many reasons people participate. Some do it purely for social purposes, others because they want to stay in shape, some because they are goal oriented, while others just like to push their body’s limits. It’s interesting, for much of my time as an athlete, I am not sure I would say I have trained for the very simple reason of just loving the sport. 

When a sport becomes so wrapped up in identity, we can often lose our love. I felt this way about running. What once was a fun way to move my body became a complicated and unhealthy way to maintain calories, feel as though I was worth something, and ultimately, my entire identity. 

This past year or so, I’ve begun to recreate love for moving my body that removes the thought of calories burned, trophies earned, and recognition from strangers. Biking, brought a joy to moving my body again that I didn’t know was possible. With races being shut down, I have been abruptly challenged to again reassess my drive to perform in races and ask myself why I am training. 

The answer has not felt so simple at times. There are days when it doesn’t make sense to put in that much effort for races that are no longer on the schedule. Some days exercise still feels rooted in eating disordered thoughts. At the end of the day though, I have been able to come back to my root reason for pushing my body in the first place, I love to train. I love how it makes me feel. I love the mental clarity it gives me. And I love that, while races have been cancelled, I still feel driven to keep working hard in a sport that I love. 

So, athletes, I challenge you to ask yourself, what are you training for? Create ways in which training perhaps can become more joyful once again. We have a rare opportunity to go back to the basics of the sport. Fall in love with your sport all over again, simply because you love it, now for what accolades it might bring you. 

We will compete again someday, but ultimately, we are training for life, and life seems like a pretty important thing to be training for. 

I am enough. When you hear that, do you believe it? To me, being “enough” is worthy of love, self-care, taking up space, and feeling capable of handling all the emotions, challenges and victories that come with life. Sometimes, our beliefs can navigate us away from a place that we feel we are enough. Dani wants you to help you own the belief you are enough, take away any doubt you may have and embody being enough and everything that comes with it.

 She believes connection is vital to a positive therapeutic experience. She connects with my clients by creating a space for you to show up just as you are and meet you there. She takes an eclectic approach that is rooted in person-centered and strength based, with a focus on your needs and goals. After all, therapy is about you.